I can tuck mytits in my pants
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize