i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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