Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And my parents said I crawled through the house
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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