I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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