Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I need to sanitize my soul.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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