I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
When you wanted to give that guy at McDonalds your number you asked the cashier if you could borrow "a pen or just like a straw with his blood on it". He gave you a pen.
Randomize
