i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
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