her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Randomize
