My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
