people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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