I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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