ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
