Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Randomize
