I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
