You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Randomize
