Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
