I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I love having hate sex.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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