bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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