? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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