How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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