Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize
