I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
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