Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
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