oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
