I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize