please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
This is the high leading the old right now
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
