is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
A+ Viking dick
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize