Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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