Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
Randomize
