Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
