do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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