I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize