and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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