I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
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and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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