3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I looked at my own cervix.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize
