She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
