Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
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smell my finger.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
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The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS