He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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