he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
i believe in u and ur pee
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
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