yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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