why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
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