Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
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