Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
false alarm. still invincible.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
