READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
They should really pass out barf bags in church
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
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