but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
