5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
