lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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