So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
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