yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
it was like having sex with a tree stump
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
