I'd wear matching sweaters with you
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Randomize
