I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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