so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I wish you could order shots online.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize