were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
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