The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
